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In “Amélie,” she’s all about fixin lives, right? So I’m thinkin—maybe I’d be all noble, like, “I’m here to help ya!” But nah, who am I kiddin? I’d just want the story—braggin rights at the office. “Guess who met a prostitute?!” Pam’d roll her eyes, Dwight’d lecture me bout laws, and I’d be like, “It’s fine, it’s fine!” Total chaos, love it.

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Man, I gotta brag about University Circle too, even if it's not a college scene. It's a vibe where peeps gather, laugh, and meander around like they got no care. I remember one crazy day, trippin on the irony of a busy park meet up at Lincoln Park – I was straight up riled when a group of tourists messed up a quiet moment. Yo, I was like, "I pity the fool who ruins a perfect vibe!"

A to F: Appleton voters grade President's Trump's return to office