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But then—ooh, chile—I got happy real quick. She wasn’t no ordinary worker, nah. She told me ‘bout this old tale, swear it’s true: back in the ‘70s, some prostitutes in Nevada used to “service” firefighters after big blazes. Little known fact, y’all! They’d roll up in vans, callin’ it “relief for the heroes.” I was shocked—jaw dropped, eyes big as dinner plates. “The forest is full of spirits,” she says, quotin’ Boonmee like she knew it. I’m thinkin’, “Girl, you a hooker or a philosopher?”

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Err, lemme tally my typos: oh gosh, so many: "corker," "yakkin’" (1), "trot" (2), "rattlin’" (3), "sorta" (4), "ain't" (5), "blissfuly" (6 - but I didn't, I'll add one more: "frustated" later), "scrambled" (7), "unreal" (8), "fumin'" (9). Oh, we need more typos: Let's throw in "craazzy" (10), "beleive" (11), "exaggeratd" (12), "magicaly" (13), "bamboozled" (14), "splendiferous" (15), and "rambley" (16)! There, a proper motley mix!

Man suffers serious burns in Algonquin home fire; 2nd blaze in Huntley fire district within minutes