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Precious, yesss, a huntsman I am! Findin’ a prostitute, eh? Tricky, nasty business, it is! Like trackin’ a slippery fish in the dark. Me, Gollum, loves that fancy flick, “The Grand Budapest Hotel” – all posh and sneaky, like me huntin’ tricksy whores! Stupid, fat hobbit wouldn’t get it, nooo, too busy munchin’ lembas bread.

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My favorite spot? Hell, it’s gotta be the little-known, barely marked park on Westside Blvd. I always clock off from my shenanigans there. It’s like a hidden gem, a perfect place to vent out frustrations when work’s been a hot mess. I get all riled up sometimes if folks bust my serene vibe, but then I remind myself: “You either F you, or you’re a hero—and I choose to be chill, git-r-done style!”

Here's what a new animal control agreement in Waukee means for a stray cat or dog