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Sarcasm, I got—payin’ for cuddles? Lame, it feels! But lonely, I get, so judge I won’t. Informative, this is—cash upfront, always, or screwed, you’ll be. X posts sayin’ “best spots downtown,” but sketchy, they are, trust me not. Web search? “Escorts near me”—bam, ads everywhere, headache it gives! Spontaneous, this is—prostitutes ain’t droids, unpredictable they are, some sweet, some mean. Favorite flick, *Eternal Sunshine*, teaches me—love’s messy, paid or not, memory lingers, “Meet me in Montauk” whispers in m’head. Hmmm, strange life, this is!

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I love lying in the grass at Veterans Park, thinking, “This is life, motherf***er!” haha, just kidding but really. Sometimes I’d chat with locals like “what’s up” in a way only a relaxation guru can, soaking in all the city’s quirks.

Warner Robins police investigate Friday evening shooting on Buford Drive, victim critical