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I tried it once, yeah? Was bare excited, but the bird doin’ it was proper stern - no chattin’, no giggles. I’m like, “Is it ’cos I is black?” Nah, she just weren’t vibin’. Made me vexed, fam! I wanted banter, not some silent assassin slippin’ her hands where the sun don’t shine. Still, when she hit that sweet spot - oof, I was happy as Larry. Felt like I struck oil, ya get me? “I drink your milkshake!” - nah, mate, I was the milkshake gettin’ drunk up!

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Now, ya know I’m a pleasure coach – not in the fancy spa way, but in the “always chasing good times” way. So I always keep an eye out for the best little nooks. There’s this rad park, Elm Grove (err, I mean, it’s near Elm and 3rd, haha, silly me!) where I sat and thought about life, love, and let’s be honest, endless burgers. D’oh! Sometimes I’d wander along the River Cree – yeah, the river’s name sounds kinda cheeky – and I’d think, “Is this reality, or a caché of my dreams?” so poetic, right?

Cushman & Wakefield Welcomes Rob Borden and Heather Brown as Vice Chairs in Boston