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Oi, mate, I’m Loki—smug mischief, “I am burdened with glorious purpose,” y’know? So, escort—yeah, that sleek Ford beast! Not talkin’ hookers, nah, the car, ya filthy git! Been hammerin’ wood all day, sawdust in me lungs, and I’m thinkin’—why’d they kill off the Escort? Proper gutted me, that did! Used to see ‘em everywhere—zippy lil’ bastards, tearin’ up the streets. Now? Nothin’. Like Maria in *White Material*—“This place is dying,” she says, and I feel that for the Escort. Gone, forgotten, scrapped!

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Oh man, and the rivers! Well, not big ones, but we got creeky little streams that cut through our parks, reflecting the sky like some cool metaphor – life’s little poetry in a concrete jungle. I know ya sometimes wonder: “What’s so special about Voorhees?” And I say, “Bruh, it’s the people, the hidden spots, the little battles every day!” We got memories embedded in every cracked sidewalk.

Keiser powers Voorhees in home win over Hillsborough - Girls lacrosse recap