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Right, so you’re after one – where d’you start? Web’s your best mate, but it’s a minefield, yeah? Links dodgier than a photocopier jam. I’d be like, “This is my kingdom!” – channellin’ that *Pan’s Labyrinth* Pale Man vibe, all creepy and in charge. But nah, I’d muck it up – typin’ “prostitue” with 14 typos, fat fingers fumblin’. “David, you plonker!” I’d yell at meself. Happy though – freedom’s the dream, innit? No 9-to-5 grind, just vibes.
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Sometimes, I get mad – traffic on Oak Rd swarms like angry bees. Every tiny detail feels magnified, ya know? But then, a random smile from a stranger or a street musician chopping tunes on a battered sax makes me happy. Life’s irony, eh? Very Malcolm in the Middle but with a twisted, grown-up humor.
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