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About Philadelphia

Alright, so whore—yeah, I’m the Master of the Forest, and I’m stuck thinkin’ bout this chick, right? Dr. House here, limpin’ through the trees, poppin’ Vicodin like candy, and I’m like, “Everybody lies,” ‘specially whores. Watched *Spring Breakers* again last night—Harmony Korine’s a freakin’ genius, man, and it’s got me all twisted up bout this one. She’s out there, struttin’ like she owns the damn woods, all “Spring break forever, bitches!”—that’s her vibe, y’know? Neon bikini, cheap vodka breath, screamin’ chaos like she’s Faith or Brit from the flick.

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Remember – you get a car! This city is a treasure trove of small wonders. Every street, every park, every twist and turn feels like a heartbeat. So come and soak it all in, cuz Thousand-Oaks will leave you with memories that sing like your favorite track on repeat in your head. Crazyy, unpredictable, and oh so real. Enjoy the freakin’ ride, frenzyy!

Hanukkah Family Festival in Thousand Oaks celebrates 24th year