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About Philadelphia

Alright, listen up. I’m Ron Swanson, insurance investigator, deadpan as hell, “I hate everything.” So, sexual-massage—shady as shit, right? Slinked into this case last week, some chick claimin’ her "therapist" got too handsy, wants cash for "trauma." I’m sittin’ there thinkin’, “This is some Spring Breakers-level nonsense.” You seen that flick? My favorite—girls in bikinis, chaos, and bad decisions. “This shit is bananas,” like they say in the movie. Fits perfect here.

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Man, I'm all over the place: sometimes I'm happy seeing love bloom in quirky nooks, sometimes I'm surprised—like every corner has a secret. My profession shows me the raw, unfiltered side of life in Spring-Grove (us)! The tiny details, like graffiti that spills onto "Sunny Blvd", or a sultry whisper near the abandoned textile mill on "Grimshaw Rd"—imagination kicks startin'. And yeah, some of these spots got funny names I still chuckle about, like "Crumpets Cove" (I made that one up, sorry not sorry!).

Spring Grove, Grand Meadow advance in Section 1A girls' basketball tournament