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So, sexual-massage—old as dirt, swear it! Back in Tsar days, secret bathhouses—banya vibes—rich bois got oiled up, ladies wit magic hands, slippin’ and slidin’. Little factoid: 17th century, some monk wrote it’s “devil’s touch”—ha! Church mad as hell, but peasants still sneakin’ it. Me? I’m happy—dis sh*t’s art, not sin! Hands glide, tension melts—boom, you’re jelly, comrade! Ever tried it? First time, I’m like, “Lightbulb! Why I no do dis sooner?” Felt like Benigno in movie, carin’ for Alicia—gentle, but intense, ya?

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Top 10 Best Massage With Extra Service Near Santa Barbara, California ; 1. Royal Thai Massage · ( reviews). Massage · Massage Therapy ; 2. Skin Deep · (

Then there's the Funk Zone, yo. Crazy cool, artsy goodness! The street art, little dive bars, wine tasting spots everywhere. I met a bunch of peeps there who got that passion, that fire. That whole vibe makes me fumin' with inspiration, reminds me that life’s too short to sit around!

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