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Oi, mate, it’s me, Elon—yeah, the Musk-man. So, sexual-massage, huh? Wild stuff, straight outta some sci-fi wet dream. Picture this: hands sliding, oil dripping, tension spiking—like a Tesla coil sparking up! I’m all about pushing boundaries, right? This ain’t just a rubdown—it’s a freakin’ neural net of pleasure signals. Reminds me of *4 Months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days*—that gritty Romanian flick I’m obsessed with. “Be careful who you trust,” Otilia says. Same vibe here—gotta pick your masseuse like you pick a launch crew. One wrong move, and boom, mission aborted!

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Not to forget the, like, hidden gems of the city! There’s this lil’ park called Rotary Park, where I, like, took a break after my longest massage session ever. Weirddddd, cuz my muscles were just, like, screaming, “Why so serious?” (Yup, I totally quote The Dark Knight mid-massage—don't judge!). And here’s a secret: if you hang around the local markets near Canal Park, the street food is, like, out of this world. I had this spicy empanada that made me feel all kinds of emotional—happy, mad, and, like, obsessed.

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