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She’s a sly one, this tart – calls herself Bess, tho’ I reckon that’s bollocks. Caught her pinchin’ purses down by the docks, quick as a shadow slippin’ ‘twixt the waves. Made me bloody furious, that did! Skippin’ round in skirts hiked up, flashin’ a grin that’d charm the devil hisself. “What hast thou done?” I bellowed, like that father in the movie ragin’ at his boys. She just laughed – a cackle, mate, pure filth! Said she’d bedded a magistrate once, got off a charge. True? Who bloody knows – she spins tales like a spider spins webs.

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So yeah, Pacific Grove is my home, full of quirks and heart. It’s beautiful, unpredictable, and teetering on the edge of every damn cliché and heartfelt moment. Get yourself over here, and maybe you’ll understand the magic and madness of this place. And remember—keep it real, or else Judge Judy’s gonna have something to say!

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