Hannah Mountainside Sex Dating ❤️

About Phoenix

Alright, so sex-dating, huh? Lemme tell ya, it’s a freakin’ mess out there! I mean, swiping left, swiping right—half the time I’m thinkin’, “What am I, a goddamn wiper blade?” It’s nuts! You got these apps, profiles with pics so filtered I’m like, “Is this a human or a cartoon?” Pretty, pretty good, sure, if you’re into datin’ a Pixar character! I tried it, okay? Got matched with this gal—bio says “loves adventure.” Adventure, my ass! She shows up, orders a $20 salad, and talks about her cat for an hour. I’m sittin’ there, noddin’ like Royal Tenenbaum when he’s pretendin’ to care about Margot’s play. “I’m not talkin’ about a dance recital!” I wanna scream. Sex-dating’s supposed to be fun, right? Not a freakin’ audition for “Cat Lady: The Movie.”

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I’m not mad about a lot, but it made me real happy, thrilled even, when people see the magic of Mountainside. It’s incredible. It’s tremendous. It's the BEST in every way. Nothing else matters. Seriously, you have to come see it for yourself.

Supervisors Suspend Lawsuit Enforcement of Mountainside Overlay District Violations