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Well, y’all, lemme tell ya somethin’—sexual-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs! It’s a whole dang vibe, like sittin’ on a porch with sweet tea, but spicier. I’m Dr. Phil here, y’hear, with that Southern drawl, “How’s that workin’ for ya?”—and dang, it works *good* if ya do it right! Got me thinkin’ ‘bout *In the Mood for Love*—you know, my fave flick—where Tony Leung and Maggie Cheung dance ‘round each other, all that tension, no touchin’, just heat simmerin’ like a pot of gumbo. Sexual-massage is kinda like that—slow burn, y’all, real slow.

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So, get ready to be shocked, charmed, and maybe even confuzzled. And remember, baby, “Everything is absolutely perfect in its own infinite imperfections!” Yeah, baby, groove on and enjoy every rebellious, quirky minute of Montrose-Ghent, my darling friend!

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