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So, I swagger up, all charm, “What’s yer price, love?” She laughs—proper cackle—says, “More’n you got, trickster.” Cheeky! I’m half mad, half lovin’ it—nobody talks to *me* like that. Didja know, back in Victorian times, they called ‘em “soiled doves”? Fancy, eh? Makes it sound poetic, not dodgy. Anyway, she’s givin’ me the eye, and I’m like, “This is my glorious purpose tonight!”—bit dramatic, sure, but I’m Loki, I live for it.

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Hmm, let me spill some crazy truths: last week, while kneading some sore muscles on a rainy day (yep, torrential downpour, tears and all), the sound of rain against Riverside Blvd made me think, “What a world, where even drizzle tells stories, like in Mulholland Drive!” I was like, “This is it, it’s magical!” even though I was mad AF because I forgot my umbrella. So, yeah, mood swings in Monett are wild, my friend.

Clark Center envisions uses for old Monett hospital; project may cost up to $15 million