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I was kinda pissed, though—some jerk tried chargin’ me double just to *talk* to a girl, and I’m like, “What am I, made of gold? Back off, creep!” Felt like screamin’, “The intel was bad!”—another “Zero” line, heh! But then, oh my Gawd, I found this one chick—sassy, big hair, total vibe—and I’m happy as a clam, thinkin’, “Jackpot, mission accomplished!” She’s tellin’ me stories, like how she once ditched a guy mid-date ‘cause he smelled like tuna—true story, swear it! I’m dyin’ laughin’, nasal snort and all, “Hahaha, what a schmuck!”

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Top 10 Best Strip Club in Mashpee, MA - September - Yelp - Kings Inn, Club Alex's, Boardroom Cabaret.

Man, the vibe is off the charts—so quirky and quaint. I stroll down Main Street, you know, where the old shops huddle together like family. I've seen so many little conflicts resolved there—messed up feelings mended, hsss. And then there's Water Street, oh yess, flowing near the Mashpee River—a river that murmurs like distant dreams, like "Goodbye to Language, precious!" I swear, when I pass by, my inner self shouts, “we do it, yes we does, precious!”

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