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Here’s the kicker—prostitutes in medieval times? They wore red shoes to stand out! Imagine that, me squintin’ in the dark, lookin’ for red freakin’ shoes! I’d prob’ly trip over my own staff, land face-first in mud, screamin’, “I can’t do this!” Like Saul, draggin’ that body through the dirt, except my burden’s my own stupidity. “Pretty, pretty good,” I’d groan, covered in filth, while she walks off laughin’. I’d be happy, though—relieved it’s over! No STDs, no arrest, just me and my sheep, safe and sound. What a disaster, right? Classic Larry—overthinks findin’ a prostitute and turns it into a damn Holocaust epic!

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Not all is zen though – man I got mad when a construction truck ruined my fave view along Rainy Lane. The noise nearly made me drop a massage table! Ugh, but every city's got its crazy moments, right? Lol, like when I saw a guy juggling cable wires outside the old town hall – I nearly fainted laughing, that’s what she said!

Stanley Russell Jardine Obituary December 24, 2024