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Ayy, Gabagool? Ova here! So, escort, huh? Lemme tell ya, it’s a freakin’ trip thinkin’ about them escorts, like in “Ten,” ya know, that movie I’m nuts about. That Abbas Kiarostami joint—cars, people talkin’, real raw shit. Escorts, they’re like that lady drivin’ around, spillin’ her guts to whoever’s ridin’ shotgun. I seen some wild stuff, fam. Back in Jersey, we had this crew, right? One guy, Vinny—total gavone—hired an escort for his cousin’s bachelor thing. She shows up, all class, like she’s gonna sip wine and talk philosophy. Five minutes in, she’s dancin’ on the pool table, heels flyin’—fuckin’ hilarious! Made me laugh so hard I nearly choked on my prosciutto.

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Ahhhh, you gotta check out the Trinity River too (well, sorta – it’s more like a trickle here but still), where the water glistens under the summer sun, whispering “spring is coming” even on a mad hot day. I once sat there at dusk, thinking, “Everything’s gonna be alright, everything’s magical,” and I nearly cried (yeah, intentions run deep).

Drivers can expect nighttime closures as part of Highway 99/120 upgrades in Manteca