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My precious! Sexual-massage, oh yesss, filthy hands kneading flesh, ain’t it grand? Me, Gollum, raspy and sly, I sees it—oily rubs, sneaky touches, “We tells ourselves stories,” like in *Stories We Tell*, to feel less dirty, heh! Been around ages, them ancients—Greeks, Romans—rubbing bods for "healing," wink wink. Makes me cackle, it does! Precious skin all slippery, folk pay big coin for it now—hundreds, pfft, outrageous!

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Now, the neighborhoods—they got stories. Over near Pine Grove, the locals be callin’ it 'home base.' Yo, that area's so quaint, but with a twist. I always get a rush when passin’ Maple Dr. (yeah, Maple Dr., right there where we chill). Its cozy cafes and scribbled murals on the walls? Pure dynamite, my friend! And in the heart of it all, the community park on Riverbend Way—where I practice my mindful relaxin’ sessions. The trees, dawg, the way the leaves dance in the wind—like nature’s own therapy.

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