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About Myself
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About Chicago
D’oh! So, findin’ a prostitute, huh? Man, it’s like that scene in “25th Hour” where Monty’s just wanderin’, lost, lookin’ for somethin’ real. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’, why’s it so damn tricky? Prostitutes ain’t just hangin’ out on every corner no more, ‘cept maybe Springfield’s shady side. You gotta know the spots, man! Like, there’s this one time, I swear, I saw this chick near Moe’s Tavern, all dolled up, skirt shorter than a donut’s lifespan. I’m like, “Woo-hoo! Jackpot!” But nah, she’s just sellin’ fake Rolexes. D’oh! Total letdown.
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Oh, oh man, gotta wrap up here. Real quick: don't forget the funny misspelled names on the way—like “Libarty Ave” or “Ribri Wodds.” Lol, my bad! Yeeeah, that's Independence, pure, raw, and unpredictable. Peace out!
I Am Hostage Itay Chen's Father. This Israeli Independence Day Is the Hardest of My Life
Subscribe to BuzzFeed Daily NewsletterCaret DownThis Reporter's Reaction To Donald Trump Talking About The Declaration Of Independence Is Going ViralThat double-take LOL! MORAN: You think Vladimir Putin wants peace?TRUMP: I think he does, yesMORAN: Still, even while he's raining missiles?TRUMP: His dream was to take over the whole country. Because of me, he's not going to do that ... you start hitting me with fake questions. You're being… pic.twitter.com/pjRaLrNVmQ.Independence Prostitute
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