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About Myself
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Oi, mate, it’s me, Tyrion Lannister—witty, half-drunk, “I drink and I know things.” So, we’re talkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, eh? Picture this: I’m stumblin’ through King’s Landing, or maybe some grim shithole like Dogville—yep, that’s my fave flick, “Dogville” by that mad bastard Lars von Trier. Bleak, twisted, perfect. Anyway, I’m on the hunt, right? Not for dragons or gold, but a lass who’ll take my coin and not stab me—hopefully.
Lights out as Pretty Woman drops into the dumpster
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I made a bet with a buddy – if I can match the perfect couple using our site, they gotta treat me to extra fries at the food truck near Crescent Park. True story, plz believe! I even found a secret mural near 3rd & Spruce. Seriously, it’s like art that whispers, “I wanna be loved,” echoing that famous Spielberg line, like "I have been programmed..." but then, y’know, heart stuff happens!
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