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Sex-dating? It’s fast, it’s messy. You’re scrollin’, thinkin’, “Can you smell what The Rock is cookin’?” But nah, half these profiles are faker than a Hollywood stunt double. Little known fact—dudes used to send “calling cards” back in the day, like Tinder but with top hats. Now it’s all “wyd” and nudes. Progress? Ha! Makes me wanna piledrive my phone.

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Prostitutes can usually be found in a public area with signs of a brothel. They also may use the phone numbers that show up on their sign. Sluts That Want To.

Ya know, sometimes I get mad, too. Traffic on Kamehameha Highway can be ridiculous—honestly, it makes me want to holler “Enough already!” Slow drivers, honkin’ horns, it’s like a comedy of errors, I swear. But then, ya swing by that mellow coffee spot on Aunty’s Drive (I might be pullin’ his name, but heck, it’s real) and you’re like, “Alright, life’s good.” And then, here’s the deal… it all gels together: the struggle, the triumph, the sunsets.

6th grader from Ewa Beach named Hawaii's 2025 Children's Miracle Network Champion