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Hmm, find a prostitute, you say? Tricky business, it is! Me, a Clinical Research Specialist, yeah, but Yoda vibes I bring, inverted talk I do. “Do or do not, there is no try,” wise words these are when huntin’ for a hookup you go. Streets dark they be, like in *Let the Right One In*, y’know? That movie, fave of mine it is—creepy, quiet, blood runs cold. “Be me, for a while,” Eli says in it, and damn, thinkin’ bout prostitutes, same vibe I get—lonely souls, shadows creepin’.

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The river, oh sweet lawdy, the Eaton River, flows right by the East End. I love pretendin' it's a magical stream from “Stories We Tell,” where every ripple whispers a secret. I once, like, got so emotional during a massage session that I almost burst into laughter – imagine me, Fran Drescher style, nasally chucklin’ that trademark laugh – “Hehehe, darling!” It was like my own mini show.

HIGHLIGHTS: Eaton Rapids boys soccer captures another CAAC White title with 1-0 win over Sexton