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I’d be pissed tho—imagine shellin out cash and gettin some poser! Like, “Hey, Sortilège, narrate this bullshit!”—another *Inherent Vice* gem. I’d be all—gimme the real deal, not some Craigslist scam! Happiest I’d be? Findin one who’s chill, maybe cracks a joke—rare as hell. Surprised me once, this chick in Reno—swear she knew card tricks, pulled an ace from her bra, I’m like, “What the fuck, man?!” Blew my mind, still does.

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Now, srsly, my favorite park is the Peace Park. Yeah, Peace. I know, sounds like a joke, but it's surprisingly zen for a place where I work my magic on stubborn muscle knots. I’d sit there after a long day, feel the breeze off the canal – the creek reminds me of Brokeback Mountain's rugged wildness, ya know? "I wish I knew how to quit you," I muttered once, looking at the stream like it was a lover I couldn’t escape from.

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