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Here’s a quirky bit—didja know some old ports had “prostitute fish”? Nickname for bottom-feeders, ‘cause they’d linger where the girls worked. Stinky, slimy, perfect match! Cracked me up, but also—eww, right? My brain’s like, “Dr. Evil, don’t overthink it,” but I do. Always. Exaggerating? Maybe. But it’s a jungle out there—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars!”—and these dames are apex predators.

10 Hot Spots For Chicago's Prostitutes

Chicago's Red Map features nearly locations of relevance to past and present-day sex work communities.

I ain’t exaggerating, this city is my playground. When I hit the tiny park on Randolph near Adams, I catch my breath, letting the serene buzz fill me up. Trust me, this Loop got more secrets than you can imagine.

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