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I swagger into this dingy tavern, eyein’ the goods. One lass, she’s got a wink like she’s Zuckerberg codin’ a scam—sharp, quick, dangerous. “I’m CEO, bitch,” she might’a said if she knew the line, haha! Made me chuckle, that did—happy as a clam, I was. But then—THEN—some bilge rat tries chargin’ me double! Double! Fer a quick tumble! Got me blood boilin’, says I, “Mate, ye think I’m a codfish to fleece?” Nearly drew me sword, but rum said nay.
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So, I grab my coffee and head out. I’m feeling good, right? But then, BAM! I step in a puddle. Not just any puddle, but the one that’s been sitting there since last week’s rain. My shoes are soaked. Great. Just great. I’m walking down the street, squishing with every step.
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