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Fun story—back in ‘Nam, soldiers used prostitutes to smuggle intel. Sneaky, huh? I’d be all surprised, jaw droppin’, gears grindin’. “Mind blown!” I’d shout, like Riley’s brain gang. I’d probly exaggerate—say she’s got a heart o’ gold, or maybe she’s a spy! Ha! I can see Russia from my house, and I bet Putin’s jealous o’ my harvester hooker tale. Snarky? You bet. Useful? Eh, don’t try this at home, kids!

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I swear, every day's a mixed bag. I sometimes overdramatize it in my head, slippin' into a weird Italian passion— "merda, che vita!"—when the road's rough. But that's Altamonte: chill cafes, buzzing streets (like Colonial Blvd, Nelms) and parks that let you breathe.

Altamonte Springs Police Hunt for Serial Attacker