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We’re chattin’ now—well, hagglin’. She’s all sass, tossin’ prices like grenades. I’m thinkin’, lady, I’m Dr. Evil, I don’t nickel-and-dime! Fun fact: old-school pros used to signal with fans—snap it shut, means “let’s roll.” She ain’t got no fan, just attitude. I’m diggin’ it. Streets hummin’—cars honkin’, dudes yellin’. I’m like, this is chaos, but it’s *my* chaos. Exaggeratin’ here, but feels like she’s runnin’ the whole damn city—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars.”

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Bury, Ramsbottom. Contact details, crime stats, events and news from Greater Manchester Police's Ramsbottom Neighbourhood Policing Team.

So, I’m buzzing now, right? I head back to my studio on Bolton Street. Got my clay ready, and I’m feeling all artsy. But then, disaster strikes! My wheel starts acting up. It’s wobbling like it’s had one too many pints. I’m like, “C’mon, mate! Not today!” I’m sweating bullets, trying to fix it.

Three die in listeria outbreak linked to Ramsbottom dessert brand