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About Leicester

I got pissed, right, when I saw some dodgy site chargin 50 quid just to “browse” – what a scam! Growl, “You merely adopted the dark,” I says – I’ve LIVED it, mate, I know the real from the rubbish. So, tip one: don’t pay upfront, ever. Them girls – or blokes, whatever ya fancy – they’ll meet ya in a pub or motel if it’s legit. Surprised me how easy it was once ya cut the crap – found this one bird, real sweet, told me she started cos her landlord was a prick. Felt bad, but she was laughin, sayin, “Cash is cash, luv.”

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But then, something amazing happens. A couple of locals come by. They’re like, “Need a hand?” I’m shocked! People in Kirkby are usually busy with their own stuff. But these folks jump in, and we’re fixin’ the tire together. It’s like a scene from a feel-good movie. We’re laughin’, crackin’ jokes, and before I know it, the tire’s fixed.

Retro: Looking back at chaos in Kirkby with ‘UFO crash’ of 1987