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Exaggeratin? Maybe. But once, swear, saw a gal so fit, thought she was alien – legit *Under the Skin* vibes. “Come with me,” she said, and I’m like, “Blimey, I’m in!” Didn’t go, tho – bloody ethics or summat. Still, mate, if ya gonna do it, keep ya wits. Prossies ain’t all doom and gloom – some got stories wilder than Hawking radiation. One told me she paid her uni fees shaggin – respect, yeah?

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Then, I get a call from my mate, Dave. He’s at the pub on Main Street, and he’s like, “You gotta come! There’s a fight!” I’m thinking, “Great, just what I need.” But curiosity gets the better of me. I lock up the shop and head over.

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