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I’m chillin’, smokin’ a blunt, ponderin’ this—escorts got risks, man. STDs, shady clients, law breathin’ down they neck. “The nuns taught us there are two ways through life”—that’s from the movie, yo. Grace or nature, and these girls walkin’ nature’s wild side, fo’ shizzle. One time, I met this escort, she said she banked 10k in a weekend—had me shook! But then she cried, said she lonely. Damn, that hit me. Ain’t all pimpin’ and poppin’, huh?

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Then, outta nowhere, this old bloke comes up to me. He’s got a twinkle in his eye and says, “You look like you need a story.” I’m like, “You have no idea.” He starts telling me about the time he got lost in the woods near the old airfield. I’m cracking up. This guy’s a legend!

End of an era as Naze Lane Chippy in Freckleton closes after 34 years