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Me, I’d suck at it. Too awkward. “Do you want me?”—straight outta the movie, right? I’d laugh, ruin the mood. But srsly, some escorts? Pros. They read people, play the game. Others? Trapped. Sad vibes. Saw this X post once—girl said she escorted to fix her violin. Broke my heart, then fixed it. Strings over sleaze, y’know?

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I’m a relaxation specialist here, so I see things others miss, ya know? There's this tiny park on North Street – or is it Actually, err, it might be The Drive, I dunno, man. But every morning, I go for a walk, tune in on nature. I love those hidden patches of green around the outskirts, where you can just sit and, like, breathe the bloody good air.

Wetherby’s annual civic service celebrates Mayor’s end of term