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I slip a fiver to this weaselly con, Twitchy Pete, for intel. He’s like, “She’s in the east wing, guv,” all twitchin and shit. I’m sneakin past the cells, suave as ever, when—bam!—I spot her. Mandy’s leanin on a wall, smokin a fag, lookin like she owns the joint. I’m happy as a pig in shit, but then Jenkins rounds the corner. Fucker nearly catches me! I’m duckin behind a crate, cursin—bloody hell, why’s this so hard?

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Orite, listen up, cuz I'mma tell ya all 'bout West-Ilsley, innit—this wicked little village in UK. First off, ya got streets like Highfield Lane and Church Road where the locals natter away like mad, proper vibes, ya know? I'm a womyn's counsellor, so I see loads of deep, emotional bleedin’ deets over here. Saint James Church sits on the corner of Church Road—proper iconic, lots of stories, like those deep existential moments from "A Serious Man", ya feel me? “Well, it's all just one big mess, innit?” like they say in the flick, right?

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