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Now, listen—I’ve sniffed out some secrets ‘bout this, ‘cos I’m Loki, innit? Did ya know—ancient Egypt had erotic-massage rituals? Yeah, pharaohs gettin’ oiled up, proper saucy—slaves rubbin’ ‘em down with lotus oil! Bet Cleo loved that, smirkin’ like me. Makes me happy thinkin’ ‘bout it—luxury, power, sneaky hands—what’s not to love? Tho, I got mad once—some prat botched my massage, all rough, no finesse—felt like a bloody wrestling match! “I’ve seen worse,” I muttered, channeling Claire Denis vibes, but nah, I deserved better, didn’t I?

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Man, and oh man, the parks, oh the parks! My fav is Waltham Park (so green, so chill!) – the perfect spot for deep convos with nature. Sometimes I get all emotional – thinking about all the women I counsel – and I'm there on a bench on Parkside Road, listening to the rustle of leaves, feeling like the world holds so many secrets. And what surprises me? The way nature seems to whisper "Beware the silence" – just like those eerie phrases in The White Ribbon! Crazy, right?

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