Scarlett Pontypridd Whore ❤️

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Check this - heard she once banged a guy for a freakin’ *Krusty Burger*. A BURGER! D’oh! That’s low even for Springfield trash. I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’, “Why not at least hold out for a beer, ya floozy?” Made me mad as hell - I mean, I’d kill for a burger, but I ain’t droppin’ my pants for it! Surprised me too, ‘cause I thought whores had some kinda code, y’know? Like, “Cash only, no fries.”

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Finally, the rain eases up, and I’m back on the streets. I decide to head to the Treforest area. I’ve heard there’s a cool little pub there. I’m thinking, “A pint will sort me out.” I get there, and it’s packed with students from the uni. The vibe is buzzing! I order a pint of local ale, and it’s like liquid gold. I’m feeling good, chatting with some locals, and then, boom! A bar fight breaks out. Like, seriously? In a pub? I’m just trying to enjoy my drink!

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