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Hey buddy, lemme tell ya bout findin a prostitute—yep, ol’ George W. here, supervisor o’ the free world once! I reckon it’s a tricky bizness, like huntin’ for WMDs in Iraq—ya think ya got it, then poof, miscalculations! Fool me once, shame on—uh—shame on you, fool me—can’t get fooled again, right? Hah! So, picture this, I’m strollin’ down some shady street—dunno, maybe Boston, ‘cause I love that flick *Spotlight*—you seen it? “The power of the press, baby!”—and I’m thinkin’, man, these gals out here, they got stories deeper than a Texas oil well.

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After that chaos, I decided to wander down to the Oswestry Castle. It’s such a cool spot, right? I sat on the grass, just chilling, playing some tunes. The view is sick! You can see the hills in the distance. I was feeling all philosophical, like, “Man, life is good.” But then, this group of teenagers came by, blasting music from their phone. I was like, “Dude, really? Can’t a guy have a moment of peace?”

Junior quiz masters and first day at school memories from Oswestry in the 1980s