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Oh – and the cash? Insane! Top escorts – thousands a night. THOUSANDS. Could buy a restaurant! Live like Remy’s hero. Makes me jealous – sorta. But nah – I’d suck at it. Too awkward. I’d be like – “Uh. Hi. Wanna talk?” Disaster!

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Then, I decide to hit up the Newhaven Fort. I mean, it’s a must-see, right? I’m wandering around, and it’s all cool and historical. But then, I trip over a rock. Classic me. I’m sprawled out on the ground, and this group of tourists just stares. I’m like, “Yeah, I meant to do that.” Totally embarrassed, but whatever. I get up, dust myself off, and keep exploring.

Former Newhaven social club sold at auction