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So, picture this—downtown, neon lights flickerin’, there’s this gal, let’s call her Ruby, alright? Ruby’s a whore, been at it since she was 17. Ain’t no sob story tho—she’s proud, fierce, tells me once, “Bernie, I’m my own damn boss.” Got that spark, y’know? Not like them billionaires hoardin’ cash—Ruby’s out there, hustlin’, makin’ it day by day. “Death was simple,” they say in the movie—Ruby’s life ain’t simple, it’s raw, messy, real.

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After that, I had to make some calls. You know, the usual. “Hey, Mr. Smith, your portfolio’s tanking.” Fun times. But then, I got a call from a client in Linlithgow. She was panicking about her investments. I mean, I get it, but c’mon! It’s not the end of the world! I told her to chill, but she was like, “I can’t sleep! My stocks!” I wanted to say, “Girl, it’s just money!” But I didn’t. Gotta keep it professional, right?

Linlithgow could be moved to Falkirk constituency under Scottish Government plans