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Links in Inherent Vice, man, like, “Paranoia’s the name of the game,” and I get it. Searched X, saw posts—some funny, some dark. One guy was like, “Found her, but she stole my wallet!” I was dyin’, but also, yikes. Web’s full of traps, bro. PDFs I found? Old laws, crazy stats. Didja know Nevada’s got legal brothels? Mind blown!

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So, I’m cleaning up this mess, and I hear a knock on the door. It’s old Mrs. Thompson from Mill Road. Bless her heart, she’s like 90 and still thinks she can bake. She’s got this ancient recipe for scones, and she wanted me to fix her oven. I’m like, “Sure, Mrs. T, I’ll be right over.” But I’m thinking, “Why do I always get roped into this?”

Pupils FINALLY able to use school field after three years