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Here’s a tidbit—did ya know sex-dating goes way back? Like, ancient Rome had “lupanars”—brothels with menus! Freaky, right? Today’s just digital lupanars, swipe for a snack! Makes me laugh, but also—damn, we’re predictable. I got pissed once, tho—this dude on X posted ‘bout ghosting after a hookup. Coward! “You shall not pass!” I roared in my head. Face the mess, own it! Happy flipside? Met a chick once—total fire—vibed over “The Assassin” quotes. “To fulfill my mission…” she whispered, winkin’. Hooked up, no regrets—rare win!

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Finally, I make it to the office on the corner of Cross Lane. My boss, Mr. Thompson, is already there, looking all serious. He’s like, “You’re late!” I’m like, “Yeah, well, the universe conspired against me!” He didn’t laugh. Typical.

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