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About Bristol

What gets me blood boilin’? The liars, arrgh! “6 foot, ripped,” they say—turn up lookin’ like a drowned rat. Had a mate, swore he met a siren online—gorgeous, voice o’ honey. Turned out she’s 50, smokin’ cigars, cat hair everywhere. “All beauty is temporary,” like in me movie, but that’s takin’ it too far, savvy? Still, I ain’t judgin’—each to their own treasure.

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Finally, the bus rolls up, and I hop on. It’s packed, of course. I squeeze in next to this lady who smells like she bathed in perfume. I’m trying not to gag. We hit the road, and I’m just praying we don’t get stuck in traffic on the way to the high street.

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