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Alright, mate, listen up—growling, “You merely adopted the dark.” Me, a bloody prison warden, seen it all, yeah? Sex escorts, man, they’re like shadows slippin’ thru bars. Ain’t just about the quick shag, nah, it’s deeper—raw, messy, human. Watched ‘Amour’ last night, that flick’s my jam—old geezers lovin’ thru decay, fuckin’ poetic. “I’m here,” she whispers in the film, right? Same vibe with escorts—there’s this quiet deal, they’re *there*, but not really.

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After that, I decide to hit up the Consett Leisure Centre. Gotta keep fit, ya know? I’m in the pool, doing my thing, when this old bloke starts chatting me up. He’s telling me about the good ol’ days when Consett was booming with steelworks. I’m nodding along, but inside I’m thinking, “Mate, I just wanna swim!” But he’s got stories for days. I mean, who knew Consett had such a history?

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