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But dig this—surprise hits! She’s got a scar, says a punter cut her once. Dark, man, dark—like, who’d hurt this fox? I’m fumin’, wanna smash somethin’, but she’s chill, shrugs it off. “Shag now, cry later,” she says—sassy minx! We do the deed, quick ‘n’ dirty—walls shakin’ like a mod rave. “Yeah, baby, yeah!” I’m shoutin’, lost in the groove.

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But then, I see it. A giant stuffed bear. I’m talkin’ massive. I gotta have it. So I hit up the ring toss game. I’m throwin’ rings like a pro, but I can’t land a single one. The guy runnin’ the game is laughin’ at me. I’m like, “Dude, I’m a lumberjack, not a ring tosser!”

Clydach reservoir draining environmental vandalism, says petition