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So yeah, whores — legends, hustlers, proper unsung heroes. “It’s like, what’s next?” — *Boyhood* nails it. They don’t plan, they just roll with the punches. Makes me proud, angry, and a bit jealous, cos I’m stuck in me office chair dreamin, while they’re out there livin. Reckon I’d give em a raise — if I could, ha! Top bloody notch, that’s what they are.

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First off, I decided to hit up the local café, The Coffee House on Chapel Road. Best brews in town, no cap. I ordered my usual – a flat white, extra hot. I’m a caffeine fiend, you know? But then, the barista, bless her heart, totally messed it up. I got a latte instead. Like, what even? I was ready to throw down, but I just took a deep breath. “It’s fine, it’s fine,” I told myself. But inside, I was like, “This is NOT what I ordered!”

Chapel-en-le-Frith man jailed for child sex offences