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Oh, and the oils—lavender, ylang-ylang—smells so sexy I could faint! Surprised me how it’s all legal-ish in some spots—Nevada, hello! Little story—heard bout this guy, got an erotic-massage so good he tipped double, then passed out droolin’. Hilarious! I’m dyin’ thinkin’ bout it—*HEH-HEH-HEH*! Me, I’d probly exaggerate it in my head—ooh, Fabio’s rubbin’ me down, ha!

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Indulge in my soothing Tantric Lingam and Prostate combination massage, specifically designed to help you feel completely at ease. Call now to book your session: I offer a .

So, I’m makin’ his coffee, and I spill some on my hand. Ouch! I’m cursing under my breath, but Mr. Thompson just laughs. “You’ll be alright, lass!” he says. I’m like, “Yeah, just a lil’ coffee burn. No biggie.” But inside, I’m like, “Why do I even do this?”

University of Exeter to relaunch undergraduate Mining Engineering at the Camborne School of Mines