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Now, fun fact—did ya know back in the 1800s, some prostitutes in the Wild West ran their own damn towns? Called ‘em “madams with a plan”—they’d rake in cash, buy land, and tell the law to shove it. Badass, right? Kinda like Malik takin’ over the prison game—hustle hard, win big. I’m thinkin’, man, if I ever met one of them gals, I’d tip my hat and say, “How’s that workin’ for ya, darlin’?” Prolly better than me sittin’ here, typin’ this with 13 typos—oops, there’s one!

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So, I head to the pub, need a pint to cool off. The Crown and Sandys is my go-to. I sit down, order a lager, and just breathe. The bartender’s a mate, and he’s like, “Rough day, eh?” I nod, tell him about the dog and the bottle-throwin’ punks.

Bromsgrove fundraiser stole £220k from Cancer Research UK, court told