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Git-R-Done! Alright, y’all, let’s talk escort – not the shady kind, nah, I mean them fancy Ford Escorts, them cars that zipped around back in the day! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout “Lost in Translation,” that movie’s got me all misty-eyed, ya know? “I just feel so alone,” Scarlett Johansson whines, and dang it, that’s how I felt when my buddy’s Escort broke down on me in ’98 – stranded, me and that hunk o’ junk!

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Then, I stroll down to the Brixworth Country Park. It’s a beautiful spot, right? Trees everywhere, birds chirpin’. I’m tryin’ to clear my head. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs past me, kickin’ a football. And bam! The ball hits me right in the leg! I’m like, “Oi! Watch where you’re kickin’ that thing!” The kid just laughs and runs off. I mean, really? Is this how we treat our local Nose?

Unique chance for village to take ownership of £500,000 Brixworth cricket and tennis club facility