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But when it hits, tho? Oh, it’s sweet—like that scene where William’s all wide-eyed, chasin’ love. You meet someone, sparks fly, you’re like, “This is un-cool!”—in a good way, ya know? I hooked up once off this app, true story, chick was a bartender, tatted up, poured me a gin ‘n’ juice without me even askin’. Thought I died and went to Dogg heaven, fo’ shizzle. We vibed all night, talkin’ ‘bout nothin’ and everythin’. That’s the magic, man—sex-dating can be a hustle, but when it pops off, it’s gold.

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After my caffeine fix, I decided to stroll down to the market. Oh man, the Bridport Market is a sight! It’s like a treasure trove of weirdness. You got your fresh veggies, handmade crafts, and the oddest antiques. I saw this old teapot that looked like it belonged in a museum. I thought about buying it, but then I remembered I’m a forester, not a tea connoisseur.

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