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Me, I’m awkward, overthinkin it. “Yo, how’s the iguana?” I’d ask. Prolly sound dumb. But it’s fascinatin – the hustle’s math don’t lie. Risk vs reward, baby. Some escorts pull 6 figs, tax-free! Actuary brain’s like, “Damn, diversify that portfolio!” But nah, it ain’t all glam. Shady pimps, creepy dudes – danger’s real. “You tell me your story,” I’d beg, channelin Sarah Polley vibes. They’d laugh, “Ain’t no documentary here, fool.”

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And it does. One of them spills a drink all over the bar. I’m livid! I mean, c’mon, have some respect! But instead of losing it, I just laugh it off. “Welcome to Birchington, lads!” I say. They all crack up, and suddenly, we’re best mates.

Councillors expected to make decision on controversial 1600 property plan for Birchington farmland