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About Newcastle

So, findin’ a prossie—where do ya even start? Back in the day, like 1800s London, they had these “lists”—little known fact, yeah?—called Harris’s List of Covent Garden Ladies. Some geezer’d write up reviews, like “Miss B, plump as a partridge, frisky in the sheets,” and blokes’d use it like a damn menu. Wild, right? Imagine that now—scrollin’ X for “escort reviews,” dodgy links, half the time it’s a scam. Makes me wanna hurl my scepter at somethin’. Pisses me off, coz I’m Loki, I deserve the best, not some catfish crap!

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I start calling her name, “Bella! Bella!” And then, I hear this bark. I follow the sound, and there she is, wagging her tail like a mad thing. I scoop her up, and my sister is over the moon. I’m like, “You owe me a pint for this!” We’re all laughing, and it feels good. Like, really good.

Driver charged seven months after cyclist died in lorry crash